


Error 404: <Not Found>

by DandelionWhine



Category: Steven Universe (Cartoon)
Genre: AU: Everything is Awful, Canon Divergent, Darkfic, Digital Art, Error 404 AU, Forced Fusion, M/M, Manipulation, Misgendering, Obsession, On Hiatus, Possessive Behavior, Rape/Non-con Elements, Steven Universe: The Movie, Stevencest - Freeform, Time Travel, Yandere, the diamonds are lowkey still abusive
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-06-16
Updated: 2020-08-08
Packaged: 2021-03-04 07:40:05
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death, Rape/Non-Con, Underage
Chapters: 6
Words: 14,092
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24749995
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DandelionWhine/pseuds/DandelionWhine
Summary: "If you're not Steven, what are you?"The Not Steven blinks, looking down at itself while it considers the question deeply. Eventually it lifts its head, parting its lips to give the Amethyst the only answer it can offer."Error 404: Not Found."--An AU where Steven's human half dies from Spinel's bio-poison and it short circuits his gem.
Relationships: Pink Steven Universe/Steven Universe
Comments: 38
Kudos: 186





	1. Error 404

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Special thanks to the stevencest discord server (rip) for helping me out with some of the technicalities of this AU.  
> Happy reading!

** Error 404: <Not Found> **

<010010100101110101011010110010>

A glow of white, a flash of pink, and the light form of the lone diamond which had been resting on decaying earth is brought into existence.

"Error 404: Not Found."

A dull buzzing noise accompanies the sound of the static voice as the world comes into view, the grey/purple/pink/black of the sky roiling on the horizon of split, jagged, lifeless earth.

"Terraformed?"

A pink, glowing, oozing liquid crashes over the cracked up terrain, eating away what remains of this planet and its organic inhabitance.

"Negative."

The being looks around, turning on its heel rather awkwardly to take in the full scope of the scene before it. An empty injector sits securely in the center of a small elevation of geomorphic landforms which overlook what looks to be a body of water that is polluted with the same pink, glowing liquid.

"Bio-poison." The being decides, intently observing the dusty, lifeless sediment below its feet.

Its glowing eyes focus on the dried petals of an organic life form that has been crushed under the weight of its foot. A thought tugs at the back of its mind while it studies the poor, dead thing, wondering what on earth it was called.

"Plant."

It tests the world on its tongue, voice clipping electronically over the vowel. It crinkles its nose, eyes narrowing before they go wide in realization.

"Flower."

Something twinges in its chest and its lips twitch into a frown, a phantom of a feeling that is just as strangely familiar as it is grossly unfamiliar. Suddenly, the low humming, buzzing noise intensifies and its right then that the being notices the strange appearance of its feet below it.

One of them, the left one, has a strapped, loose hard-light representation of some kind of footwear which has been burnt up and melted away into almost nothingness. The other foot is bare, but stranger than their outfitting is the way their light form is disrupted, with sections of the left and the whole right foot displaying white static lines running up and down instead of the smooth, bright pink which is far more befitting. It makes the being widen its eyes in alarm.

"System Reboot." It commands.

The patches of fuzzy light glitch for a moment, the beings legs swirling in bright white before they reappear, completely unchanged.

"Error 0X800701E3: Request failed due to a fatal device hardware error."

The words come out stilted, strained with a crackling pop like it's coming through a faulty microphone. The being lifts its hands from its sides, scanning over them intensely. It takes note of the state of its right hand which is the same as its warped feet, white static lines buzzing all the way down its fingers. Its left hand, however, is perfectly, justly pink with a hard-light sleeve reaching its wrist. Its right arm is completely bare of any such covering, the sleeve destroyed and gone all the way up to its right shoulder.

The sight of its tattered clothing, along with the state of its static limbs, is unsettling to the being. There's a gap in its recollection, a void where the information should be stored but has been wiped, leaving the being to stew in unanswered questions and a nameless feeling of wrongness.

"Steven!" Warbling voices call out from the distance, and the being's ears perk to hear the sound of cascading footsteps from behind it.

It turns on its heel again, the destroyed shoe folding uncooperatively beneath its foot. It quickly spots the three gems racing forward, watching an array of reactions flicker over their faces as they draw near. A stunted Amethyst gapes openly, eyes wide and horrified. A Pearl lets out a shriek, the sound muffled by her hands which come to cover her mouth. An unidentifiable gem, tall, broad and wearing glasses, slowly approaches the being with outstretched hands, cautious but deliberate, and two gems glint in the center of either open palm. A fusion, then.

"We're taking you to Rose's fountain, Steven." The fusion says, her voice trembling only slightly. "We need to heal you."

The being stares at the fusion's hands, studying the cut of the gems and filtering through potential identifications. The name they're saying, referring to it as, makes the buzzing of its form begin to intensify, its static wavering faster.

"C'mon dude, let's go." The Amethyst encourages, putting on a brave face before it starts to falter as she claws a hand through her long hair. "You're kinda freaking us out here."

"Please, Steven, come with us." The Pearl begs tearfully, blue eyes shinning wetly.

"Steven." The being blurts, eyes hard and critical. Its mouth moves slowly to form the name and its voice sounds sharp and electric.

The three gems ripple with the shock that voice sends them, gasping in fright.

"Not Steven."

There's a moment of silence as the gems receive this information, before the Amethyst breaks it.

"If you're not Steven, what are you?"

The Not Steven blinks, looking down at itself while it considers the question deeply. Eventually it lifts it's head, parting it's lips to give the Amethyst the only answer it can offer.

"Error 404: Not Found."

<010010100101110101011010110010>

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Art of 404's initial design included above.
> 
> Let me know if you enjoyed this chapter down in the comments. More chapters to come shortly. Thanks for reading!


	2. Error 0X800701E3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Crystal Gems attempt to heal the Not Steven. The mystery begins to unravel.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter has been edited to fix some previous coding inaccuracies. Happy reading!

** Error 0X800701E3: <Request failed due to a fatal device hardware error> **

<010010100101110101011010110010>

"Why isn't the rose water _working_?" The Pearl frets, panic clearly overtaking her as she wrings her wet hands. Despite the lack of effect, they resolutely continue bathing the stoic being who is sitting calmly in the fountain, watching them with vague interest. These three gems seem to be convinced that it is a boy they know and love. "It should be healing him."

"Error 0X800701E3: Request failed due to a fatal device hardware error." Error 404 announces in reply, as good as an automated response system.

The gems freeze, ceasing their ministrations at once, struck by its bluntness and its wording. The Pearl has paled significantly, an impressive feat given her alabaster complexion. The Amethyst's pupils have turned to pinpricks, eyes wide and glassy. The fusion's mouth has formed a hard line, the rest of her undoubtedly troubled expression hidden beneath her visor.

"Does—" The Amethyst begins, choking on the words, looking to her team for assurance. "Does that mean . . ."

"No!" The Pearl outbursts, the tears that have been pooling in her eyes finally spilling over her cheeks. "We found Steven. He's right _here_ , he's _in front of us_ , he's _still alive,_ he's-he's just _hurt_ so we have to _heal_ him—"

"Spinel's injector destroyed all organic life on earth." The fusion interjects, voice steady, carefully devoid of feeling. She breathes in and holds it. Her voice is significantly quieter when she next speaks. "Steven is half organic."

It's deadly silent as the information settles through the group. It's the knowledge they have been unanimously avoiding. A mutual wave of denial and hope has brought them to this point, urging the Steven-look-alike to Rose's Fountain to do the only thing they could, the only way they knew how. And it hasn't worked.

"'Your human half won't stand a chance against my injector.'" The Amethyst recounts, voice cracking in multiple places, trembling in others. "That's what Spinel said to him when she first showed up."

The Pearl's manic eyes fix themselves onto 404 and it's as if she is truly seeing it for the first time. Her lips wobble horrendously. She grabs onto the Amethyst's shoulder, desperate to keep herself from keeling over. She averts her gaze to the statue of Rose Quartz spewing fountain water like tears down her cheeks.

"If Steven's organic half is—" She gurgles, gasping, as she physically stops herself from finishing that thought. It feels like a hundred pound weight has dropped onto her gem, a hundred thoughts wizzing through her mind in the span of a few seconds. "Then that means this is . . ."

The Pearl looks 404 over slowly. Her gaze halts at the gem stuck in its navel and her expression becomes cloudy. Her voice is little more than a strained whisper, equally disbelieving and dismayed: ". . . Pink Diamond?"

At the mention of that name, the space between the three gems seems to ignite with a fiery tension. 404, blissfully unaware of the gravity of this claim, just stares at them blankly. Its impassive, ignorant stare does not diffuse the situation in the slightest. Instead, it only worsens it.

"No, no, no." The Pearl contradicts herself frantically, hands coming up to tug on her hair. She is grimacing painfully, her eyes squeezing shut. "The gem is taking Steven's form but then what is. . . I don't understand why he's . . . he's-he's _different_ , he's _off-color_ , why—"

The Not Pink Diamond straightens like a board, creating a slosh and a ripple in the fountain.

"Off-Color." It echoes, voice relatively soft but chilling nonetheless. Its brows draw together in the first hint of emotion they've seen from the being since they found it on the cliffside. Its eyes start flitting back and forth while its head remains stock-still, as if it's reading something behind its eyes. "Diamond. Off-Color. Pink Diamond. Off-Color."

The output becomes more and more agitated as it continues to repeat itself, words overlapping and mixing until it sounds like a garbled mess of robotic commands. The gems surrounding it look on, worried and bewildered by its behavior and guilty that they were the ones who seemed to bring it out. And yet they are relieved, somewhat, that the gem half of their beloved hybrid seems to be able to recognize at least some gem terminology, if not Steven's own memories and experiences.

All of the sudden, 404's eyes quit moving over whatever internal databases it had been scanning, gaze going still and far-off. Its pinched face gradually relaxes, returning to its aloof countenance.

"Error Code 16: System cannot identify all the resources this device uses."

"Well, that's obvious," The Amethyst mutters under her breath.

"Without Steven, his gem seems unable to access his memories, most likely due to being rejuvenated." The fusion surmises, studying the lone half of her quasi-son and trailing over the patches of static that cover his right side. "His form shows damage, but the fountain water should have healed any damage to the gem itself."

The fusion zeroes in on the trail of static on the beings belly, leading to and curving around the bottom half of his gem placement. Her lips turn downwards into a deep frown.

"I . . . assume these marks are a result of what separated Steven from his gem in the first place."

The atmosphere is still and silent while the gems stew in the implications of this. Slowly, the Amethyst approaches 404, bending down slightly to meet its mismatched eyes.

"Do you remember anything that happened before you reformed?" She asks, hope and dread apparent in the way she looks at it.

404 takes in the question, searching its inventory for a few tense moments.

"Error 404: Not Found."

This doesn't seem to be the correct response, because the Amethyst's face falls, looking away dejectedly as she steps back, shrinking into herself with arms crossed over her chest.

Suddenly and without warning, the Pearl sloshes forward and grips onto 404's shoulders. The being flinches back slightly in surprise, but its expression remains mostly unchanged, only vaguely curious. The Pearl's face zooms closer so they are nose to nose, and 404 can practically see the lightbulb blinking in her gem.

"If you're Steven's gem half," She begins feverishly, "That means you can _heal_ Steven's human half."

The Amethyst perks up, snapping her fingers in recognition. "Yeah, like the donut boy!"

"Exactly!" The Pearl cheers, straightening to face the Amethyst with her hands splayed out. "We just have to find Steven's human half!"

The fusion grasps her chin thoughtfully. It's obvious from the silence that the two other gems in this entourage aren't fully convinced.

"That . . . might be hard," The Amethyst hesitates, a flash of pain crossing her features. "And what if we do find it and. . ." She trails off, a hand coming up to her chest to clutch her gem.

"Well, we can't just sit here and do nothing, Amethyst." The Pearl snaps, the manic excitement that had possessed her moments ago turning to outrage. "We have to try!"

The Amethyst, whose eyes were trained on the floor, looks up to the fusion for guidance, peering through her silver, flowing hair.

"Can you See it, Garnet?"

The fusion, Garnet, falters. She brings a hand to her temple and her glasses dissipate with a shimmer of golden light. Her three, multi-colored eyes are averted, narrowed in anguish.

"I haven't Seen anything." She admits, her voice dripping in shame. 404 watches intently as her hands begin to shake, then seize, before she clenches them into fists. "I can't bring myself to look."

404 receives this information along with a tug of recognition, studying the look of sorrow on the Garnet's face, the glint of unshed tears in her third eye. It begins to make some calculations.

"Gem. Half." It says, bringing a hand to its gem, clutching over it like the Amethyst had. "Diamond. Healed." It looks down, observing the static of its right hand, the sections of its form in which the display has been compromised. "Off-Color." It frowns, and its hand clenches into a fist.

"Woah, hey, relax, man," The Amethyst jumps in, wary that the being will spiral like before. "We're gonna go back and find your other half. We're gonna fix this, okay?"

"Half. Fix. Half." 404 continues, eyes trained on the Amethyst. It recalls her earlier request. "Reformed. Remember. Reformed. Half. Gem. Human. Half."

The Amethyst has gone still, along with the others, as they raptly taken in this stilted process of deduction. They wait with bated breath for some kind of breakthrough, for a flash of light and for a restoration of this unprecedented gem who has been reduced to total confusion and broken coding.

None of that happens. Instead, the being's expression clears once again, finally reaching its conclusion.

"Error 39: System cannot load the device driver for this software. The driver may be corrupted or missing."

The gems deflate, clearly disappointed. Eventually, however, they gather themselves, deciding on a plan of action: return to earth and search for Steven’s human half. _Or whatever remains of it_ goes unsaid. It isn't long after they reach their conclusion that they set off on their way, absolutely no time to waste. They drag Steven’s gem half along with them, walking through the overgrown brambles of the garden and soon reaching the warp pad.

404 can sense their unease, observing them with interest as they brace for their return to a decimated earth, a dead world where they must search for an organic being who they had clearly never anticipated to die along with it.

<010010100101110101011010110010>   
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Art of the design for 404's scars/markings included above. 
> 
> Thanks for reading! Go on and leave a comment if you enjoyed this chapter!


	3. Error Code 39

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Gems search for Steven's body. A few unexpected guests arrive. 404 makes some connections.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Mind the tags for this chapter; this is not a pretty story and Graphic Depictions of Violence reflects that.
> 
> With that out of the way, please enjoy this chapter!

Error Code 39: <System cannot load the device driver for this software. The driver may be corrupted or missing>

<010010100101110101011010110010>

They arrive back at the warp they had used to get to the fountain, one that is placed within a slightly upturned wooden shelter. It is clearly out of commission; the foundation has been shaken due to the shifting earth beneath it, the electric light and appliances are futile as their source of power seems to have been compromised, and 404 can't imagine the cozy, personalized abode is going to be used to house any organic life on this unsuitable planet any longer. Looking around, the being is almost regretful that this perfectly adequate housing unit is never to be utilized again, reduced to a waste of space and resources.

As they make their way into the foyer, something catches 404's eye, and it stops to take in the information screaming out to it. Hanging on the wall at the base of the stairwell is a painted portrait of a woman with billows of rose-colored ringlets, a serene expression on her pale face and a slight smile tugging on her plump lips. Something about this portrait feels strangely familiar to the being, though it cannot fathom why. The depiction of this mysterious figure is setting off an alarm somewhere in the depths of its gem, almost too faintly to notice. On top of the familiarity, 404 can't make sense of why this image seems off to it, as if something about it is _false_. Without access to all of the information and memories that are apparently locked away in its database, it can only stare with a barely furrowed brow at the painting in frustrated confusion.

"Do you know who that is?"

404 is startled out of its train of thought by the Amethyst who has approached it, her careful hand hovering over its shoulder. It turns sharply to face her, expression drawing a blank once again. The Amethyst looks sheepish, but that doesn't stop her from continuing to question the being eagerly.

"Do you remember her?"

_Remember._

404's lips twitch, anticipating its true to form answer even before it spills out of its mouth. "Error 404: Not Found."

The Amethyst simply nods, seeming to recognize its distress under the instinctual layer of indifference.

For whatever reason, _that_ feels familiar to the being as well.

Mentally shaking it off, it looks back to the gem entourage, expecting to be led to the site they suspect the being's lost organic counterpart to be. It wants to feel invested in this search, but the thick layer of clouds in its mind prevent it from feeling much of anything, like it's been unplugged, disconnected from whatever used to make it tick. Regardless, the being is willing to see this journey through, and follows behind the Garnet to return to the spot it had initially reformed not forty minutes ago.

The arrive at the site, beholding the injector that had caused this destruction. The gems split up at once, calling the organic's name repeatedly, searching in the cracks and crevices of the earth, in craters, over the cliffside, along the injector's entry point, everywhere under the darkened, magenta sky.

Aimless, 404 looks down to the dead ground. It once again takes note of its feet, the off-color right one glaringly improper next to the perfect, glowing pink one. It raises its hands, staring intensely, critically, as it recounts the Garnet's words from earlier, from when they were at the fountain.

_'I assume these marks are a result of what separated Steven from his gem in the first place.'_

Could that be the case? Are its off-color markings simply a result of the bio-poison currently wreaking havoc on this planet? It is a substance that gemkind should be completely impervious to, and yet the evidence continues to pile up. If this organic counterpart suffered from the bio-poison prior to their discorporation, it would explain the state of the being's hard light clothes, the tears and tatters that seemed to have been burned away wherever the markings appear.

Glancing over what remains of the jacket resting upon its shoulders, it suddenly realizes it may have to reconsider that hypothesis. There is a hole it didn't notice before, located on the bottom half of the left sleeve and approximately the size of its fist. Curious, the being removes the article to get a better look at its form beneath it, searching for the same static that is marring its right side. The entire left arm is appropriately pink at first glance. However, as it lifts its elbow, it finds strange white scoring: a collection of small, horizontal lines varying in thickness are placed along the back of its forearm, like scratches etched onto stone.

"Knock-knock, Steven."

An inappropriately cheerful voice booms from the sky and 404's head whips up to see an enormous anthropomorphic ship descending onto the ruinous land. Immediately, 404 recognizes the ship for being gem technology at its finest, if nothing else. It drops the jacket from its hands, completely forgotten.

"It's us."

404's attention is pulled away from the pristine monstrosity of a spacecraft by the three gems who have abandoned their search to come by its side, equal parts guarded and panicked.

"The Diamonds."

The Garnet has swiftly placed herself in front of the being. Her stance is wide and protective, but her hands which are clenched and shaking by her sides betray her trepidation. The Pearl has started pacing, muttering to everyone and no one about this less than ideal set of circumstances. The Amethyst, for her part, is looking right at the being with her wide eyes. Whether she is watching out for some sign of recognition or for another fit of agitated coding, 404 isn't sure.

The ship nears the cliff, resting it's enormous hands on the fragile edge.

"Are we interrupting something?"

When 404 and the gems offer no response, the humanoid spacecraft simply backs up to hover right at the shoreline. With the burst of a white bubble from the forehead of the ship, three massive, imposing figures float down and set themselves onto the sand. _Diamonds_ , 404 confirms internally. Their heads are upturned and absolutely towering over the smaller gems and the cliff on which they stand.

The three Diamonds open their eyes one by one, the Blue Diamond first. She seems startled by what she sees, the dark atmosphere and magenta glow offsetting her hue.

"Oh, my," She gasps, lifting a hand to her mouth.

This causes the Yellow Diamond to crack open her lids, peering down with narrowed eyes until they widen with shock.

"By the Stars, what happened here?" She shouts, rumbling the ground with her volume. Her eyes flit and then focus on the injector. "Is that—"

"An injector?" The White Diamond, the largest and most imposing of them all, cuts her off. "But that impossible!" She flounders, looking to the Diamonds on either side of her. "We did away with all technology used to colonize and destroy planets at the start of Era 3."

"Except for what was left in Pink's armory." The Yellow Diamond contradicts gravely.

"But who could have—" The Blue Diamond trails off, looking back to the small gems in mystification. The other two Diamonds follow her gaze and stare down at them expectantly.

"Crystal Gems, explain this situation at once." The White Diamond, clearly their leader, commands with some exasperation in her voice.

The Blue Diamond elbows her superior gently.

"Please." The White Diamond adds through gritted teeth.

After a moment's hesitation, the Pearl takes the lead, stepping forward to give a shaky run down of the days events. _Spinel, Rejuvenator, Injector, Bio-Poison, Garden, Pink, Evacuate,_ and _Destroyed_ are words that stick out to 404, who has stayed in place behind the Garnet during the Pearl's entire explanation, complying with her effort to hide it from view.

"So, where is Spinel now?" The Yellow Diamond asks after the Pearl finishes, her expression scornful.

"Bubbled." Garnet suddenly speaks up, voice loud and firm. "Stowed away in our temple."

The Yellow and White Diamond look as if they want to argue, but the Blue Diamond upsets whatever train of thought they are following with her short, melancholic inquiry:

"And Steven?"

The Garnet tenses and the Pearl loses all of her composure. The Amethyst stays silent but attempts to discreetly shuffle next to Garnet, blocking 404 from being seen as much as she's able.

The Pearl stutters, "W-well, you see, we-we're not exactly sure what. . . I-I mean, we don't know h-how—"

"What is that you're hiding?" The Yellow Diamond interrupts, eyes narrowed suspiciously and pointing a gloved finger at the Garnet.

The Pearl snaps her mouth shut, tipping her head down in shame. The foiled Amethyst steps away reluctantly, shaking her head. It's the Garnet that stays put, her form vibrating with emotion but her stance stubbornly immovable. That is, until the Pearl reaches out, gripping onto the fusion's arm beseechingly.

The Garnet looks to her sharply and it's only a few moments before her trembling intensifies, her hands twitching, arms seizing, legs turning to jelly. 404 watches the fusion crumble before it, falling to her knees as her form is encompassed in white light and split apart into two. A Ruby materializes first, scrambling onto her hands and knees and looking around in desperation. Then the other, a Sapphire, takes form. The aristocratic gem immediately curls into herself as sobs wrench out of her, completely inconsolable even when the Ruby crawls over, cradling and attempting to comfort her.

Once 404 tears its eyes away from the scene at its feet, it is finally able to see the Diamonds in plain view. They are staring in disbelief, horror, and barely concealed disgust.

"What is that?" The Yellow Diamond breathes, nose crinkled in distaste, eyes glued to the being.

"That's Steven's gem." The Amethyst rasps, carding a nervous hand through her hair.

"Are you . . ." The Blue Diamond leans forward, her sorrowful eyes glimmering with tears, ". . . Pink?"

The being doesn't miss a beat, spitting out the phrase with more electric ferocity than usual. "Error 404: Not Found."

The Blue Diamond frowns in confusion, head shaking and lip trembling as she stands up straight again. 

"I don't understand . . ." The White Diamond looks stupefied, her pale eyes fixed on 404 with a strange sort of recognition that is warring with her bewilderment. "Steven's gem looked nothing like this when they were first separated!"

The Diamond leader freezes once those words are out, lips sealing shut, but it's far too late. Eyes all around shift from 404 to the White Diamond, making her shrink in on herself like a scolded child.

"What does _that_ mean?" The Amethyst shrieks, "When have they been separated _before_ now?"

A barrage of interrogations rains down on the Head Diamond from all sides, each one more heated than the last as they slowly but surely unravel the story behind her statement. 404 watches with mild interest as the Crystal Gems and Diamonds alike tear into their supposed leader. It is missing too much context, on top of lacking the emotional inventory, to do anything but stand there and observe, attempting to connect dots that simply aren't there to connect. A small hand gripping onto its tattered pant leg effectively distracts it from the scene, however, as it looks back down to the weeping Ruby and Sapphire. 

"There's so much we could never predict when it came to you, Steven," The Ruby grits out. She rubbing her gemless hand on the Sapphire's back and the other is being used to tug on its pant leg like a lifeline. "You were always there for us. You always knew what to do and what to say." She hiccups, her small voice pinching. "But we never knew what to do. And we weren't there when you needed us."

404 blinks, frowning slightly. There's some thought tugging at its mind, some feeling rising in its gem that has no name or classification, barely felt like the ghost sensation of an amputated limb.

"I'm so sorry," the Sapphire cries, her hands covering her face. 404 snaps to her, catching the smallest glimpse of her single eye beneath her bangs, one that sees the future but so reluctant to do so. It reminds the being of something completely unreachable.

The Sapphire's breath hitches as she reaches up to grab its hand, squeezing hard.

"I'm sorry I couldn't prevent this." She wails. "I'm sorry I didn't protect you."

_Protect._

That word sticks out, ringing over and over again in the being's ears until it begins to reverberate down to its gem, vibrating throughout 404's very core.

"Protect." It repeats, "Didn't. Protect."

The Ruby and Sapphire gaze up at 404, awash with guilt, but their expressions change altogether when their faces are suddenly lit up from a white glow, tear tracks glistening as a result of the shine from the gem in the being's belly.

404 looks down at itself, mismatched eyes glittering with astonishment as its gem continues to glow brighter, illuminating its surroundings. The bickering of the other gems screeches to a halt when they catch sight of 404 lifting off of the ground, its gem reaching an unprecedented brilliance.

All at once, a stream of images begin to flash before 404's eyes.

_Listening to the radio in the back of the van, leaning against Dad as they softly sing along. He's so little, and Dad is so big and safe._

404 mouth morphs into a tiny smile, floating higher off of the ground.

_Walking through the door of his new house for the first time, luggage in tow, and being greeted by the Crystal Gems who look so happy to see him._

"Garnet. Amethyst. Pearl." 404 calls out to them with recognition, his voice laden with an unmistakable hint of emotion but still maintaining that tinny, computerized quality.

_Steven's family. Their family. His family._

404 looks around the devastated earth that used to be his home, seeing it with new eyes.

_Gem family, at least._

The realization of exactly what died, who died, due to the injector sitting deviously on the cliff causes a wave of heavy sorrow to wash over him. He begins lowering back to the ground, eyes wide and vacant.

"Dad."

_Saving the girl from the parade with his bubble, getting lost with her in the ocean, handing back her lost bracelet._

"Connie."

_Performing in the Beach-A-Palooza, dazzling audiences with his showmanship and flair._

Mismatched eyes rapidly search the premises for any sign of the town he grew up with, finding nothing but the Crystal Gems watching him, inching toward him, desperate to reach out and comfort but still so unsure of him. His gaze lifts and he sees the Diamonds frozen to their spots by the cliff's edge. Blue has tears leaking from her giant eyes, her hand resting against the gem in her chest. Yellow's hands are sprawled on the cliff, leaning in to watch him closer. And White—

_White taking him between her fingers, splaying him out on her palm, locking him in place so her black, razor-sharp nails can pluck him out of himself, ripping Steven away from him for the first time_.

404 stumbles back, shaking his head as the memory assaults him.

_Reforming for the first time, catching sight the sickly human boy unable to stand up, begging to rejoin with him. Feeling a pull, a duty to protect this human, be with this human._

The empty hole in his database is steadily filling with the memories of his other half, along with an ache.

_Connie lowering the boy into his arms and being met with the surge of emotions that come from their connection, their touch. The overwhelming relief, the amazement, the elation. Pure joy, pure fulfillment, pure self as they hug, they beam, they laugh, they spin around and around and around until they are one again._

The ache is becoming unbearable, relocating to his chest where a heart should be beating but instead is empty.

_'I'm me. I've always been me.'_

"Steven." 404 croaks, face impassive but gem twisting in agony. "Steven. Where is my . . ?"

Snapshots of memories cycle through his mind rapid-fire at the request, so overpowering that it causes 404 to fall to his knees.

_Broadcasting with the diamonds. Connie kissing him on the cheek. Pearl with a bass guitar strapped over her shoulder. An ube cake roll in a bubble. His and Amethyst's handshake. Little Homeworld. Picking a yellow flower from the green grass on the hill and applying his spit to the stem to make it regrow, good as new._

Error 404 notices his form is glowing brighter, along with his gem, as he looks down at his hands clenched into the dirt. His off-color hand is stagnant next to the electric pink hue, pale and deadened.

_The sky darkening, a gruesome machine descending from swirling clouds and finding its home in the earth. The Crystal Gems running from the threat as he screams out a warning that's too late as they are sliced in half in one swoop of the scythe. Failing to lift the injector from the ground, falling back as the poison spurts and dissolves through his jacket, burning him and drawing blood._ _Walking along Spinel and Mom's old garden, learning of yet another one of her horrible deeds. Spinel spiraling back into madness, urging the injector back into the earth after he had worked so hard to get through to her. Climbing up the injector's base, hearing a roar and seeing Alexandrite save the town, leaving him alone to reason with yet another enemy gem._

Ruby and Sapphire are agape in wonder when he glances at them, now understanding their pleas for forgiveness. It doesn't change anything.

_Slipping, gripping, scrambling and falling off the side of the injector that had barely any traction to begin with._ _Praying to float, begging to be okay. Praying for his powers to come back, begging for his gem to save him like it's done hundreds of times before as he free-falls. Plummeting to the ground with a sickening crack, and the unbelievable pain that mingles with numbness in his lower body. Screaming as a puddle of bio-poison begins eating through his clothes, then his flesh, and he can't begin to move away from it. Paralyzed as the liquid begins burning away the right side of his body, impossibly excruciating as it trickles over him, spreading and reaching his gem like tendrils of fire. And that's when it all goes black._

404 is reeling at the influx of horrid memories and strong emotions that overcome him, the terror and pain he remembers but is ultimately disconnected from in this state. A drop of glittering water falls from his chin and onto the ground beneath him and he suddenly becomes aware of the tears that have been streaming down his cheeks, recognized but not felt. He's calculating, putting the puzzle of the last 24 hours together piece by piece, albeit at a rate that is almost dizzying.

He's still processing information when the wet patch of dirt starts to sparkle and glow, and from the gentle light something begins sprouting. The lifeless earth pushes up blades of bright green grass surrounding the sprout, so stark against the dark, decrepit soil. The sprout blooms with a shimmer of pink light glittering up into the air like spores, revealing it's yellow petals, so bright and lively and absolutely beautiful.

404 stares at it for what feels like an eternity. His gem is pulsing, throbbing with a newfound energy that this little sign of life has brought about in him. The flower is quaint, small and delicate but so impactful, so daring to fight against the laws of nature, the common sense that says it shouldn't exist but it does anyway.

It reminds him of someone, a presence he misses more than words can describe, a precious life he failed to protect.

<010010100101110101011010110010>

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The gorgeous art this chapter was painted by the incredibly talented [Katelena](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Katelena/pseuds/Katelena)! If you haven't read her story, what the hell are you even doing? Go check it out!
> 
> Thanks for reading!


	4. Era 404

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The B-Team shows up. The Diamonds aren't very happy. A new era begins.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the wait on this one, I'd been so stuck but I spent hours pumping it out today. Hope it was worth the wait. Happy reading!

** Era 404 **

<010010100101110101011010110010>

_Reaching, weak and desperate, for the one thing that makes him whole, colliding with the floor and sprawling to try and crawl his way over._

"I . . . I need—"

_"No . . . p-please . . . I need_ — _I need it."_

"I need him."

Amethyst is suddenly by his side, crouching down to where he kneels, hands hovering over his shoulders as if afraid he might shock her with the tumultuous energy circulating from his gem.

"I need him." 404 insists, grabbing onto Amethyst himself, gripping her arms in a hold so tight it would surely bruise any human.

Amethyst is wincing, though not from any physical pain. "I know, bud."

She carefully dislodges from his hold, only to wrap him up in one of her own, arms enclosing around his torso and pulling him to her in a tight hug.

"Steven." he chokes.

"I know."

404 watched his tears drip onto Amethyst's shoulder, tears that poured from his vacant eyes. Without his other half, he was emotionally stunted, capable of contextualizing the pain rocketing through his entire being but incapable of expressing it save for the silent streams of pink tears. It seems like a mockery of grief to him, to experience being so removed from the tragedy as a result of the tragedy itself. 404 has been cheated out of a proper mourning, forever separated from the part of him to mourn.

"Steven. Steven. Steven."

"Steven!" A voice calls from the sky, though not nearly as booming and omnipresent as the last time.

"You found him!" Another voice, much lower and coming from the ground, rings out in relief. "Thank the stars!"

Amethyst pulls back from their embrace, turning to face the new presence.

"What are the Diamonds doing here?" a slighter voice, pinched and nasal, questions uneasily.

"Guys, wait—" Ruby tries, attempting to slow their eager charge into the scene.

"Ruby? Sapphire? Oh no, what happened?" The deep voice cautions.

Before Amethyst gets the chance to move away, blue arms roughly push her aside and all of the sudden 404 is face to face with Lapis Lazuli.

"Oh, Steven! I'm so glad you're okay!" She blurts out too soon before the relief on her face morphs into concern, then fear. "What happened to you?"

"Not Steven." 404 mutters dejectedly.

"Ease up, Lazuli." Amethyst grouses, picking herself up off the ground. "He's kinda been through a lot today."

A sparkle and whoosh directs all attention over to where Ruby and Sapphire had been sitting and have come together once again. Garnet adjusts her visor. "Leave him be. Come over here and we'll explain everything."

The Crystal Gem B-Team, however reluctantly, leaves him to collect himself and receive their answers from a second hand source. Amethyst practically has to pry Lapis off of him. 404 barely registers Amethyst stepping away not long after, going to convene with the gems about finding the next step in dealing with the problem of _him_. Not that it bothered the wayward diamond. He couldn't bring himself to care for much of anything aside from his missing human half, and the pull his gem felt towards him. It was this unbearable, overwhelming sense of deficiency, an abscess of soul-crushing emptiness where his humanity should be.

He couldn't bring himself to move from his spot, crouched on the soil, stuck on the command to seek out his other half which kept being derailed by what he knew was true, and then repeated like an endless mantra, a broken record, a loop. This instinct, this drive to be with the human was all consuming. It pressed heavily on him, the pressure so immense it felt like he would crack. Funny that the gem had thought it was the human who couldn't survive without him, unable to function properly and doomed to die once separated from his source of energy. 404 isn't so sure now that he's any different. He is a tempest of loose energy with no place to reside, no vessel to contain it. If 404 didn't know any better, he would think he's dying, too, bound to fizzle out into nothingness.

But above all else, he knows. 404 knows that he is a diamond, built to be unbreakable. Meant to lead, made to keep it together.

So why did it feel like he was falling apart?

"Pink."

Pulled from his maelstrom of thoughts, 404 looks up. The Diamonds have approached this side of the cliff and are looking upon him with conflicting expressions. Blue looks mournful, as she often used to. Yellow looks exhausted and irate. And White looks at him with a removed sense of determination, a look he remembers from years ago, during Era 2.

"Not Pink. Error 404: Not Fou—"

"Pipe down." White snaps, the command in her voice clear. "The three of us have come to an agreement. With your colony in shambles and in your state of . . ." She hesitates, finding the right word, "disarray, we think it's best for you to come with us back to Homeworld and, shall we say, start fresh."

"What?" Lapis shouts over his shoulder.

"Hold on, you can't just—" Bismuth attempts to argue, but is swiftly cut off by the prestigious White.

"I will not be swayed by the likes of you gems. After all, it was under your reckless care that the earth has been destroyed and our Steven has been assassinated." She bites, fury lighting up her royal demeanor. The Crystal Gems flinch. "Leaving us to salvage what is left. You may have had domain over Steven before. As a human, his rightful place was on earth. But Pink is of our kind. Clearly, we are the only ones fit to handle this situation and attempt to heal the damage that has been done to our Starlight."

404 tenses at the nickname, but otherwise stays silent, bound by White's command.

"You can't just take him!" Pearl protests. "He belongs with us. We're his family!"

"Not anymore." Yellow sneers. "You've made sure of that."

"We will bring Pink to the palace to begin the process of recovery." Blue asserts, her tone melancholy but absolute. "You may be allowed short visits, supervised of course, once everything has been sorted and Pink resumes her place on the throne."

At the beginnings of several protests, White was quick to shut them down with a threat.

"If you'd like to keep your physical forms and refrain from wasting away in a bubble, I suggest you do as we say. This event has marked the beginning of Era 4 and, like it or not, things will be undergoing massive change."

"Steven, say something!" Amethyst demands, turning him by the shoulders to face her, desperate, bulging eyes boring into him, seeking out the conviction of her pseudo-brother. "Tell them they can't do this!"

"Not Steven." 404 face is blank, regretfully emotionless.

Amethyst's expression sinks.

"Come, Pink," White calls, the power in her voice not to be argued with. "Let's go home and get you taken care of."

404 stands automatically, shuffling towards the Diamonds who are lifted by the same white disc that brought them from the ship. Blue reaches out a hand to him, and he steps upon it unquestioningly.

"Stop!" Garnet voice can be heard, fierce and fiery.

_"Steven, get down here!" Garnet bellows in a memory, a hundred feet below a homeworld ship and surrounded by ocean water._

_"She wouldn't have wanted this," Steven makes his voice small, "but I do."_

_"I'm gonna kick your butt," Amethyst threatens, but her voice loses it's conviction immediately, "If you don't come down here right now!"_

_"Steven," Pearl whimpers as he walks into his doom, the ship door closing behind him._

_"No, don't you dare!" Connie shrieks._

_Steven looks over his shoulder, choking back the tears._

_"I love you."_

404 doesn't so much as look over his shoulder. He can hear the gems begging him not to go, crying out for him to resist, for the Diamonds to show mercy.

There's nothing to be done. No way to fix what's been broken. No way to restore the things they've lost. The only option was to go along with the Diamonds to Homeworld.

Steven wouldn't have wanted this, but 404 does. He's tired of being on this hopeless hunk of rock. Steven was the only shred of hope this planet had to offer, the only thing that's even a little bit important to the Not-Steven. But he's gone. 404 doesn't need to see his organic body's remnants to know that Steven is dead. He can feel it.

And he can't stand one more second wallowing at his burial ground.

Thus marks the beginning of Era 4.

<010010100101110101011010110010>

In the few days since arriving on Homeworld, the Diamonds have done everything in their power to restore their Pink to the proper standards of a diamond. He was admittedly very quiet, but they were able to force a string of four or five basic, sensical words out of him from time to time. He was despondent most of the time, staring at them with an emptiness that was as disconcerting as it was chilling. It was clear to them that this little diamond was no longer the Pink they knew, nor the Steven they had embraced. He was a completely new being.

Then there was the matter of being an off-color diamond, a huge area of contention both in the authority and the society they ruled. The static markings on 404's form were unconventional for a ruling monarch to have in the best of outlooks, and downright scandalous in the worst. That and the wretched state of 404's light form clothing served as a brutal reminder of how this situation came to be in the first place.

Yellow had tried her best to adjust the little diamond's physical form, but not before multiple assurances that she was not going to make him assume his first form and was simply trying to erase his blemishes. Still, there was only so much that could be done when 404 kept resisting her efforts.

"Why won't you let us help you, Pink?" Blue moans one day in the throne room where all three diamonds had set up an intervention for him, desperate to get through to their youngest and try to understand how to fix him.

404 is silent in the face of this questioning, gripping onto his static shoulder with his flawless hand, gaze fixed on the tiled ground. He isn't quite sure why, but surrendering his form to the Diamond's whims is the last thing he was going to allow to happen. As ghastly as he knows he looks, it felt as if changing his appearance would somehow kill Steven all over again, eradicating any trace that he existed in the first place. So 404 stood his ground, endlessly stubborn.

"If you're going to lead, you must assume the position of a leader in every way. This includes your appearance." Yellow lectures, pacing back and forth by her throne, hands gesticulating firmly. "How can you expect any gem to fall in line behind you when you look the way you do?"

"Maybe I don't want to lead." 404 speaks up, arms crossed in front of his chest.

"What are you talking about?" Yellow sighs, pinching her nose in frustration.

"Oh, Pink!" Blue whines. "We go through all this trouble only for you to step down from your rightful place on the throne? There are expectations to be met, duties for you to uphold. You can't just dismiss them like this!"

"Why not?" He challenges, hands at his sides and clenching into fists. "I'm not Pink Diamond. She's go—"

"That is quite enough." White growls from her seat on her throne, massive claws slamming onto the armrests and creating a reverberation throughout the room. "You're making Blue and Yellow upset."

"It's not that we don't accept you, Pink," Blue mutters somewhat apologetically. "It's only, well, we know you have so much potential. We just want what's best for you."

"And honestly, Pink," White starts new, "Don't you think a little change would be good for you? You can let go of what's holding you back and shine brighter than ever before. Doesn't that sound nice, Starlight?"

404 glowers at her, eyes narrowed to slits. "Not Starlight." He snarls.

White's softened expression falls away, leaving a cold disposition. "Fine." She breathes. "If you won't reform on your own, you leave us absolutely no choice."

His eyes widen in confusion, only taking half a step back before he understands what she means.

"Destabilize her, Yellow."

White's voice is laced with the command of a diamond, and it's half a second at most before Yellow raises her gloved hand and 404 is overcome by a bolt of electricity, too quick to raise his shield against it.

The little diamond bites his lip, refusing to cry out from the shock of Yellow's concentrated power and give them the satisfaction, even as his form seizes and jolts uncontrollably.

"Think long and hard about your reformation, Starlight." White warns, but her tone is slightly honeyed like a mother putting her child in time out.

404 can feel his resolve running out, knowing that any second he will poof and his gem will clatter to the tiled floor for the Diamonds to do with what they please.

"And find something other than those tattered rags to wear."

With White's final command fading into nothingness, 404's form is compromised.

<010010100101110101011010110010>

When 404 comes to, he's in his room in the palace. He has no way of knowing how long he's been out, whether or not he'd been bubbled as extra punishment for daring to assert his opinion. He only knows that his time spent choosing his new form inside his gem had felt excruciatingly long. Under White's influence, he had been forced to forgo the pieces of clothing his Steven had been wearing at his time of death, the last piece of who they used to be together before their untimely end.

The new clothes he had chosen would have to serve as tribute.

Pink trousers were cuffed at 404's ankles like all of Steven's jeans had been. He wore a short sleeved, mauve t-shirt underneath a magenta vest with a diamond-shaped cut out at the belly, displaying his gem for all of Homeworld to see and bow down to. But the most important element, the one that tied it all together, was the dark star plastered onto his chest, a color as close to black as his natural hues would allow. It was his mark, the insignia of the Crystal Gems and Steven's personal trademark, that could display his mourning for his lost other half, the boy he just couldn't let go of, no matter what the Diamonds made him do.

404 traced the star with his right hand, only to notice that his static marking were still glaringly apparent. He hadn't realized they would still be there; they certainly weren't kept on purpose.

When the Diamonds saw 404 in his new form, they lamented over this fact. It seems that no matter what they tried to do, how they tried to color him perfect pink, it simply wouldn't be fixed. They couldn't erase what had been done to Steven and, by proxy, to their precious Starlight. It seemed that this fault in 404's code would be just that, completely irreversible, just like Steven's death was.

404 was almost glad, relieved to know there was something they couldn't take away from him.

The next few weeks were a political nightmare for the Diamonds. They had no choice but to explain the situation and embrace it, urging their kind to adjust to the mechanics of this new Era and accept everything at face value.

404, to his relief, was not given much time in the spotlight, ushered away into the palace to wait out the upset of Homeworld and it's adjoining colonies. This left him comfortable yet ultimately bored, stalling in the halls of the palace while the other Diamonds worked out where their system of government was headed. He really couldn't care less about what they ultimately decided, figuring that nothing could be worse than the overwhelming blow of losing his human half. Nothing else mattered to him.

404 would find those deft tears dripping down his face every once in a while as he spent time alone in his room, reminiscing about the boy he used to love being. The pebbles attempted to lighten his spirits, but he could tell despite their best efforts that they were a little frightened of him. He certainly wasn't fun-loving like the original Pink, nor kind and affectionate like Steven. It seemed they didn't know what to make of him.

404 could relate to that.

So he would sit, or walk the halls, or spend time in his extraction chamber, all without enthusiasm or interest. He was listless, consumed by thoughts of _Steven, Steven, Steven_ day after monotonous day, praying uselessly to see him once again and knowing deep down it would never happen.

One day, he started to sing. Just little tunes he remembered from his time as Steven, when he would love to perform and find joy in the simplicity of music. He wouldn't sing in front of anyone, not the Diamonds, not the guards, not even the pebbles. He would wait until he was truly alone so he could sing for himself, pretending that he was singing to the only one who mattered to him.

" _I'm gonna be right by your side no matter what . . ._ "

His voice was tinny, inhuman, but he could still sing on pitch. Perfect pitch, in fact.

" _All I wanna do is see you turn into a giant woman, a giant woman . . ._ "

He would wander the pink, empty halls on days when the Diamonds were loaded with work to be done.

" _I guess I have to face that in this awful place I shouldn't show a trace of doubt . . ._ "

He would find secret places that he thinks the old Pink used to know about, otherwise how had he found them so easily?

" _Familiar, why is this so familiar? . . ._ "

He would sneak into the other diamonds’ chambers while they were out dictating, quiet as a pebble so as not to be noticed by any guard or any Pearl.

" _I wanna be disobedient, disobedient . . ._ "

And then one day—

" _Steven and the Stevens, we're gonna make you smile . . ._ "

404 had an epiphany. He wanted to kick himself, really, for never considering it as a possibility before, weeks upon weeks of depression, all that time wasted when he could have done something about the horrible emptiness he was suffering from.

That day, he marched into White's chambers, resolute that, no matter what he must give up, no matter what deal he had to make to get the Diamonds to grant his wish, he will be sure to see this new, wondrous theory through.

He stomps on the ground, creating an echo that grabs White's attention from the screens in front of her to the little diamond before her.

"What is it, Starlight?" She asks tiredly.

404 takes a breath, his voice booming out with more confidence than he's ever had to muster.

"I want you to rebuild the Sea Shrine."

<010010100101110101011010110010>  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Art of 404's new form included above.
> 
> We're finished with part one! Yay! Now it's time for us to jump into the past, and into Steven's perspective. Anchors away!
> 
> I hope you enjoyed this chapter. If you did, go on and leave a comment down below!
> 
> Thanks for reading!


	5. Happily Ever After

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Peace has been established across the galaxy. Two strangers arrive. Steven has a bad time.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The cover art for this chapter was done by the marvelous [DizzyComet!](https://archiveofourown.org/users/DizzyComet/pseuds/DizzyComet) Go check out her AU, it's adorable!
> 
> Happy reading!

Happily Ever After

<010010100101110101011010110010>

Steven feels lighter than air, the bright sun above him warming his skin and the light, salty sea-breeze as refreshing as ever. He's laying on his stomach, admiring a pretty yellow flower swaying slightly in the wind. He smiles, reaching over to pick it from the ground. He sticks his pinkie in his mouth straight away, coating the tip with healing spit and touching it to the stem, making the little yellow flower grow back good as new.

He breathes out a contended sigh as he lays back on the lush hill. He looks over to see the rest of the Crystal Gems doing the same, relaxing into the grass with equally peaceful expressions.

"I want everything to stay exactly like this and never change." Steven speaks this out into the universe, eyes closed and hugging the flower to his chest.

"Agreed."

"Here, here!"

"How's the future look, Garnet?" He asks, prompting her to look over at him with an easy smile. "Do we all stay just like this forever?"

Garnet looks back up to the sky, adjusting her golden visor. The smile is wiped from her mouth almost immediately, lips downturning to a frown and then a grimace. She sits up suddenly, shaking her head as if she is disoriented. Steven's brows quirk in concern as he watches this shift.

"No." She whispers hauntedly.

A sudden gust of wind blows uphill, taking the flower in Steven's grasp with it. The gems around him get up on their feet and then all four of them are looking up to witness the clouds darken and swirl around. They soon part, revealing a hot pink sky and a giant, descending object that Steven has never seen before. It comes down to hover just above the earth, aligning itself with the elevation of the hill and showing off the mechanical spiral on the bottom.

A shadowy figure appears over the pink-crystalline heft on top of the massive contraption, slamming their foot down with a metallic clank. Steven squints, unable to discern any distinctive features like coloring or gem cut. He gets a bad feeling in his stomach anyway, reluctant to face off with yet another random enemy gem, or whatever else this figure could be, after such a long journey to peace.

"Hey!" A feminine, squeaky voice echoes out, "Are you Steven Universe?"

Steven is surprised to hear the use of his real name, not _Pink Diamond_ or _Rose Quartz_. It's a breath of fresh air as much as it's a potential cause for concern. Still, he answers truthfully, if not a little hesitantly.

"Um . . . Yes?"

"Perfect." She sneers, and the Crystal Gems watch on in confusion as her pinkie stretches wildly and her hand forms a spiral horn-like shape.

Right as she brings her horn to her mouth, a sudden flash of light appears beside her and illuminates her. For less than a second Steven is able to see her pink skin and attire, her angry glowing eyes and the magenta pig tails spiking from her head. Quick as lighting, a pink glowing blur manifests from the white flare and tackles the stranger gem. A guttural, surprised sound is ripped from her mouth as they go tumbling off the back of the contraption and plummet to the ground.

Steven rushes forward on instinct, Garnet, Amethyst and Pearl following him closely. From behind the machine there are sounds of a struggle, flying fists making impacts, shouts and growls turning plaintive before a distinctive poof indicates someone has been defeated.

The four make their way around just in time to see the profile of a familiar looking boy with a head of curls. There's no mistaking this figure for anyone else, but all four of them are still plagued with denial, squinting in confusion, convinced their eyes are playing tricks. Steven has gone pale, taking in the vibrant pink glow that emanates from his lookalike. The clone is holding the poofed, heart-shaped gem in his grasp, observing it with a hard, critical eye. It takes several seconds for anyone to do anything, recovering from the shock of an unexplained surplus of Stevens.

"Yo!" Amethyst shouts from behind their Steven, hands cupped around her mouth. The lookalike tenses but otherwise remains still. "Who the heck are you, and why do you look like Steven?"

That seems to pull his attention as he slowly turns to face the entourage head on. Steven's breath catches in his throat when a pair of mismatched eyes meet his. This being is identical to him in almost every way, the exceptions being his pink glow, his clothes and, when he comes into full view, the distorted, pale right side of him that glitches and thrums as if agitated. Steven takes a step back, feeling a cold sense of dread settle deep in the pit of his stomach.

The lookalike stares at him intensely, his blank, dark-rimmed eyes fixated and his white, diamond-shaped pupils dilating impossibly wide. His gaze never strays, glued onto Steven.

As Steven inches backwards, his lookalike steps forward, reaching out with his static hand longingly. His face stays stoic, however. The expression reminds Steven of a memory buried deep in his psyche, and that's when it clicks.

"Th-that's impossible," He chokes, tripping over his feet and stumbling backwards onto his butt. His left hand catches his fall, but his right is gripping onto the gem that's buried securely in his belly. A rush of emotions overwhelms him, the most prominent of which is confusion, second to fear.

Pearl's hand reaches for his shoulder, "Steven," She frets, but the teen's attention remains stuck on the stranger with his face.

The deformed gem's gaze finally flicks away from the hybrid, locking onto Pearl instead. Steven watches as his lookalike's pupils shrink into pinpricks. Somehow, he is able to tell what's coming, but his garbled warning is too late.

With a swipe of a static hand, three pink, hexagonal shields materialize and rush forward, each one aimed for one of Steven's family members. Steven can do nothing but twist around and watch them get pinned to the lighthouse like butterflies, grunting from the force of this twisted version of himself's power.

"Guys!" He cries out, attempting to scramble to his feet on shaky legs. His knees buckle, useless. "Let them go!"

The shields don't relent. Instead, their force increases tenfold, crushing the gems against the lighthouse as they try and fail to push free. They're letting out sounds of pain, their light-forms being pushed to the limit.

"No!" Steven screams when Amethyst gives in and poofs, her gem falling to the grass and the shield dissipating with a shimmer. "Amethyst!"

Pearl follows shortly after, but Steven holds out hope for Garnet, one of the strongest gems he knows.

"Stop it!" He begs, turning back over his shoulder and tossing his own shield at his lookalike's extended hand. His twin catches it between his fingers effortlessly and, distracted, the final hexagonal barrier disappears. Garnets slides down to her feet, fists clenching into her gauntlets. She doesn't get a chance to charge before Steven's shield is used against him, being tossed through the air like a frisbee and lodging itself into Garnet's waist. She poofs a second later, Ruby and Sapphire's gems flying in opposite directions.

And then Steven is alone, facing off with this thing, an all powerful version of himself, who has destabilized his family without a second thought. He whips around, scrambling.

"What are you?" He has to ask, completely bewildered. The one time he's seen his gem half, he looked nothing like this. He had practically been a mirror image, a pink replica of himself at age fourteen. Still, there was no denying what Steven could sense. "Y-you're my gem, aren't you?"

"Error 404: Not Found." The warped gem answers simply, as if that explains everything. His voice is robotic, _wrong_ , and Steven shudders from it.

"What?" He says shakily, shuffling backwards and away as his twin continues to approach him. "Where did you come from? W-what do you want?"

"Steven." He replies, his pupils widening once again. "My Steven."

The clouds have dissipated, rays of sunshine beaming down upon them, blue skies abound, as if everything is right with the world. This couldn't be farther from the truth according to Steven. He's practically defenseless without his team to have his back and he is shaken to his core. He summons another shield, lifting up to a kneeling position.

"Stay back!" He warns, brandishing the shield in front of him and pulling faux-bravery out from thin air.

"Protect." The gem-half blurts, seemingly unprompted, eyes widening. He looks down to his hand with the new gem clasped in it loosely. His brows draw.

"Who—" Steven barely starts to question before he's cut off.

"Don't be scared, Steven," His lookalike murmurs, lifting the heart-shaped gem up so Steven can see it clearly, pink fingers wrapped around it, held upside down. Those fingers start to tighten, turning white from the pressure. "I'll protect you."

"Wha-w _-wait_ , stop! Don't!" It takes Steven a moment to catch on, but when he does he throws the shield away, possessed by the force of his panic as he leaps to his feet and runs forward to prevent this from happening.

Except that it's over before it even starts. Considering that it took quite a few moments for him to poof Steven's family, it is truly shocking how easily the heart-gem is broken to pieces in the pink, clenched fist, sprinkling onto the ground like confetti.

Steven's belated hand is still reaching out, though, and his flesh-colored fingers graze the pink knuckles before he recoils like he's been burned. They both gasp, Steven in utter horror and his twin in obvious excitement, that blank face twisting into a grin that looks like it doesn't belong.

Steven is frozen, staring at this version of him, unable to process what he's witnessed and what he's felt. This copy of himself is a _shatterer_. He _shattered a gem_. He almost wants to laugh at how absurd it is, wants to pinch himself and hope he's having a really weird nightmare.

Except Steven knows. He knows he isn't dreaming, because when they touched he had felt something nearly indescribable but undoubtedly real. It was similar to the connection he had felt with his gem that day in White's head, but also dissimilar.

Steven already has his gem. He is already one with it. It is planted firmly where it's supposed to be, but that tiny, electric touch informed Steven that his gem is also right in front of him. When they made contact, Steven had felt an immense amount of energy buzzing from the other and traveling under his skin, reaching his very core in the hairs breadth of a second. It was almost like a static shock, except it was more layered than that, because with it had come feelings. He had felt joy and fear and hope and grief and pure, ecstatic excitement overpower him, cloying and suffocating and entirely too much.

"My Steven." His twin purrs, that chilling smile frozen on his lips like a buffering frame. Steven looks into his lidded eyes, noticing the adoration in them and, much more alarming, the _hunger_ in them. The clenched fist relaxes and the last few shards fall from his palm.

Steven can't think rationally, his mind in overdrive but his body unresponsive as he stares at the pile of shards scattered on the grass.

"You. . . You shattered her." He says hoarsely, barely above a whisper.

The grin on the copy's lips falls away, replaced by a pensive line. "To protect you."

Before Steven can argue that logic, before he can even comprehend it, the Steven-who-shatters-gems is stepping forward and gripping onto his shoulders. Steven gasps for air, feeling like he's been drenched in ice-cold water, as he's pulled into his copy's chest. The same feelings flood him once again, pulsing this time, pumping through him like his blood as his heart rate skyrockets. He cries out in surprise when he's scooped up into a pair of impossibly strong arms. Much like the day Steven first reunited with his gem, they start to spin around, and Steven is already feeling dizzy for more reasons that one.

The full-gem has started laughing; the half-human can hear it ringing in his ear and feel it thrumming through his body. Steven can't help but laugh as well, however weakly, in response. He can feel the other's elation, sense his relief, but it's tempered with something dark and painful. Laughter bordering on hysterical, tears pooling in Steven's eyes, he is overcome with the others intense feelings along with the desperate urge to push them away.

Steven thinks he might explode if this keeps up. He feels like he's going to burst at the seams from the energy of two Pink Diamonds filling him, warring with each other for room in his body. He's nauseas from it, head spinning, a terrible ache growing in his entire being. With all the strength he can muster, he kicks and pushes, jack-knifing desperately to be free from this twisted gem's embrace.

Surprisingly, Steven's efforts are successful. He falls out of the unsuspecting gem's arms and lands solidly on the ground. Unsurprisingly, his twin follows quickly after him, swooping down to the ground and nearly crushing Steven beneath him but stopping short on his hands and knees, caging the teenage boy in.

"You don't want to fuse?" It sounds like a question but might as well be a statement with the way the other looks so intensely at him. Mismatched eyes trail downwards and Steven follows his gaze. His blue star shirt has ridden up, revealing his own glittering Pink Diamond. The blazing eyes above him narrow in understanding. 

Steven is trembling, unsure what to do, at a loss for what to say.

However, when that static hand trails up his side and rests on his gem, he starts to beg. The touch sends that terrible electric current through him and he spasms in discomfort. Steven's gem was already fairly sensitive to touch, but it being touched by an alternate version of his gem made it absolutely unbearable. The contact was diametrically opposed, two magnets that should be propelling each other, a live-wire of conflicting energies at war. He was outright panicking, pleading profusely, aware of exactly what this evil twin of his was planning to do.

Steven grabs onto the hand clutching his gem with both of his own, his grip weak but his determination instinctual. He's foiled, however, by an effortless swipe of his twin's free hand that gathers his wrists in a tight grip and pins them above his head.

"Please!" Steven blubbers, tears springing to his eyes, kicking out wildly. "Don't do this! Please, let me go! Don't do this to me!"

"Don't worry, Steven," The nightmare above him shushes, lips split into a wide smile. Steven whimpers. "I'll protect you better than he ever could."

The static hand grips around his facets tight. When it starts to pull, Steven gapes, jaw falling open in a silent scream. He thrashes, shaking his head, eyes squeezed shut. The pain is familiar, the terror is familiar, but the circumstances are totally unprecedented. How could he have prepared for this? Who will save him this time? He's alone. Well, not exactly alone. Nothing like before.

"Then we'll be together again!" The distorted gem says, a strain under his eye but his mouth pinned in a horrifyingly delighted smile. Among the searing pain, Steven can feel the other's determination, his ecstacy and a tinge a guilt buried deep down beneath it all. "And I'll protect you. Always."

Tears blur Steven's vision until, all at once, the gem pops free, and the white, blinding pain slowly fades into blissful blackness.

<010010100101110101011010110010>

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you enjoyed this installment of Steven Suffers Immensely: The Fanfiction! Do you love Steven whump as much as I do? Good, 'cause it's just gonna get worse! :)
> 
> Thanks for reading!


	6. Alone Together

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Fusion . . . ACTIVATE!

Alone Together

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_Shattered._

_Unfamiliar pink gem shards scattered on the grass._

_Failed._

_A death that should have been prevented._

_Shattered._

_Familiar pink gem shards glittering on the floor, soaked in tears._

. . .

**_It's over._ **

<010010100101110101011010110010>

When Steven gathers enough strength to open his eyes, he's instantly blinded by the sun glaring down overhead. He closes them again, groaning as his head throbs in response. He feels like he's been hit by a train; his head is pounding, his mouth is dry, and his body is weak and sore. He's confused and exhausted, similar to how he would feel waking up from a too-long nap, but there's something else there that's pulling at the back of his mind, insisting something is wrong, sensing immediate danger.

Reluctantly, Steven cracks open his bleary eyes again, blinking out the brightness as his vision adjusts. Grunting, he lifts a shaking, limp hand to his left eye and gently claws to get rid of whatever is obstructing half of his vision. With a stab of latent alarm, he pulls down on his eyelid, his frantic gaze darting to each cloud floating in the blue sky above him, only visible through one of his eyes. The events of the last few moments before he blacked out slam into the forefront of his brain, making him crane his neck, chin to his chest, to frantically search for his missing piece.

He finds it at once, the drawback being it is currently in the grasp of a maniac with his face. His true other half hasn't reformed yet, leaving him more alone than ever against this threat. A chill runs down Steven's spine, remembering how quickly this twin of his shattered that stranger gem, how easily she broke apart in his fist. As of right now, Steven's gem is still in one piece, but for how long, he can't be sure.

"Please . . . I-I need it," Steven stutters and coughs painfully, lungs rattling when he sucks in a breath. 

Deftly, the twin towering above his prone form encapsulates Steven's precious pink diamond in a bubble, leaving it to levitate in the air by his shoulder.

"Please . . . Just—" He begs, already feeling worn out as he tries and fails to scramble up into a sitting position. He's stuck, prostrate, to whatever terrible turn of events is in store for him.

The being's head turns a fraction to look down at him, mismatched eyes sparkling with reverence as they trail over his face and body.

"G-give it back!" Steven tries to demand, but his voice is frail and trembling. His energy is sapping quickly but he's desperate to get through to the rogue version of himself who suddenly wields so much power over him, desperate to reason with him, desperate to see eye to eye. "I'll die without it . . ."

In a blur, the gem swoops down to the ground to meet him, his eyes blazing like fire.

"No!" He shouts fiercely, and his strong hands grip around Steven's shoulders, lifting him from the ground slightly.

Steven hadn't realized how cold he felt when a surge a warmth bleeds into him from the touch, hadn't realized how much pain had settled in his bones until it is alleviated by the connection to the gem above him. It's different from how he normally feels, wrong and warped, but it's enough to make him want to sigh from the lone sensation of it. He is still frightened, still helpless, still desperate for his rightful gem back, but he can't help but feel relief. Even still, Steven's wide, wary gaze stays focused on the gem above him.

Suddenly, Steven is yanked into a tight embrace, feeling burning hands press against his back. He shivers, bombarded by the influx of emotions this hug pours into him, powerful and confusing.

"I won't let you . . ." The gem assures him in a watery voice, squeezing him all the harder. "Not again."

Steven barely has time to register that sentence before he's distracted by the way this gem's form starts to glow brighter and brighter, blinding him like the sun before. Soon they are being consumed by white. He can feel himself melting into the other like putty and Steven doesn't have the strength or wherewithal to resist it. He has to let himself become whole again, in whatever capacity he can manage.

_When they come to, they notice the sky has turned purple. Not magenta like when that ~~mystery~~ gem ~~Spinel~~ descended onto earth, but a soothing, nighttime purple that may or may not be real. It doesn't matter, however. They are too caught up in the experience of being them._

_They look down at their hands, finding them flesh-colored, organic,_ **_human_ ** _. ~~Steven~~ ~~404~~ They can't help but smile as they stare down at them, still unable to believe that it worked, frozen in the shock of being together in this way ~~again~~ ~~for the first time~~. _

_And then something happens to their right hand. It becomes alight up with off-color static all of the sudden, sparking panic in ~~404~~ them._

_A second later, it changes again. Instead of the static, it becomes bloody red, appearing that bone and muscle are all that it is comprised of._

_They startle and gasp, mouth gaping open in horror as these different forms glitch across their body in a cycle and agitated code buzzes through their mind in an endless mantra, making ~~Steven~~ them clutch their head, fingers digging into hair that sometimes isn't there to grip onto. _

_Hot tears pool at the corner of their eyes and they squeeze them shut tightly, ~~shock~~ ~~dread~~ terror rocking ~~Steven~~ ~~404~~ them. They take in a shuddering breath and use it to let out a terrified scream._

With a force unlike any other, Steven is suddenly thrown out of the fusion, scrambling with limbs like jelly onto his hands and knees. He's panting, reeling from the experience (hallucination?) he's just gone through, trembling in the cold and fear. He takes several moments to collect himself. He doesn't know where to begin interpreting what he's just seen and felt, but the scant moments he was able to breathe in the fusion have informed him of just enough to make a stab in the dark, hopefully enough to find a compromise.

Near to him, 404 is crouching, hunched in on himself, silent as a ghost compared to Steven's heavy, shallow breaths. With effort, Steven slowly drags himself closer.

"Hey," He rasps, and his shaking voice betrays how scared he still is. Biting it down, Steven presses. "Are . . . Are you okay?"

404 shrinks in on himself even more, turning away slightly and hiding his face from view. Steven falters for a moment, unsure.

This is the terrifying, all-powerful rogue that poofed his family, shattered a gem right in front of him and violently ripped out his life force for the second time in his life. He should be terrified of him. _He is terrified of him_. He should be running away and screaming for help, despite how his weak legs won't be able to carry him that far. Still, Steven can't help but feel a pull towards him, can't help the reasoning in his brain that's screaming out to offer help to the ones who so gravely harm. Against what might be his better judgement, Steven reaches out an unsteady hand. He hesitates before it finally lands on 404's glowing shoulder.

404 stiffens but doesn't try to break contact with Steven. An apology seeps into the human from the gem, a swarm of guilt and sorrow that makes Steven soften a little more. It is fairly reassuring, learning that this creature is even capable of remorse. It inspires hope in him. With the strength their connection gives him, Steven is able to inch closer and find a comfortable sitting position beside the other.

"What happened to you?" Steven asks after a long, tense moment. His voice is hushed and careful but no less utterly dumbfounded.

Steven can feel the other's hesitation, sense the discomfort coiling in his belly as 404 peeks out from the jail of his crossed arms and peers at him. Steven raises his eyebrows, gently prompting his deeply troubled twin to say what he's thinking.

"Not me." He admits. Something dark and shrouded passes behind his eyes before he turns them away sharply. Instead, 404's gaze fixes on the swaying grass by his bare feet. He licks his lips and his voice seems to glitch a little over his next words, quiet and mumbled as they are. "It's what happened to you."

Steven take a moment to comprehend that statement, but once it clicks, it hit him like a truck. His stomach drops into his feet. A few of the puzzle pieces of his twin's existence are beginning to fall into place, albeit slowly. There's still so much Steven cannot begin to wrap his head around. He swallows thickly, a million questions whizzing through his head and a million regrets pouring into him from 404's.

If there's one thing Steven knows, it's that being anywhere outside of arms reach with his gem spells out death for his organic half. He knew it in White's head, all those years ago, and he knows it now. Coming to terms with this knowledge and applying it to his theorizing is proving especially difficult while he is currently experiencing the world as his organic half, only a fraction of the person he is supposed to be.

It's hard for Steven to think of himself as _half of himself_ , and he can't begin to imagine the circumstances that have brought this particular gem half of Steven to this point, made him into something so unlike the valiant, harmonious savior of the universe Steven has carved himself into. He is repelled by the actions of 404 yet sympathetic to his existence's implication. He innately understands the pain of separation. They are two beings that should never not be one, two halves that should never not be whole.

Unconsciously, Steven's eyes flicker up to catch sight of his gem, his _own_ gem, hovering in the air above their heads, trapped in a bubble and rendered as powerless as him. It's after several moments of him staring at it when he realizes 404 had followed his gaze. When he breaks out of his reverie and looks back down at the other, he's startled by the gem's hard stare boring into his own. Steven flushes, absurdly feeling like he got caught trying to steal a cookie before dinner.

Steven is about to open his mouth for some kind of excuse to tumble out, but he snaps it shut when 404 quickly leaps to his feet, breaking their contact and making Steven shiver, chilled by the sudden disconnect. Holding his breath, Steven watches his own gem float closer to 404's hand, coming to hover above his palm. The distorted gem looks back down at him and his expression is unreadable as they stare at one another for a long, quiet moment of palpable tension.

Without any warning, Steven is swept up by pink, the sway of 404's free hand summoning a much larger bubble that lifts him from the ground and suspends him in the air.

"What the—w-what are you doing?" Steven yelps, his voice straining out into little more than a squeak as he strains against the barrier he's so used to being in control of.

404 seems to contemplate his answer, his blank stare turning somewhat thoughtful. "Taking you somewhere safe."

Steven's eyes widen in alarm as 404 begins walking, tugging him and his bubbled gem along on either side of him.

"What? B-but right here is p-perfectly safe. Come on, just let me out and we can talk about—"

"I know what's best for you, Steven." 404 cuts him off, his voice resounding louder than before, sending an electric current through the air that penetrates the bubble and fizzles out along the top of Steven's spine. Unfazed, 404 continues on with a sure step. "I was made to keep you safe."

'You're not my gem!" Steven bursts out in frustration, his voice ricochetting back at him within the barrier.

"I'm better than your gem." 404 retorts without missing a beat, his voice now eerily calm. "I've learned from his mistakes. You're better off with me, under my protection."

Overwhelmed by anger and panic, Steven starts beating against the walls of the bubble, spitting out arguments and pleads alike. It's barely been ten seconds before the force behind Steven's pounding drains and then completely subsides, pure exhaustion and predisposed weakness making him slump into a puddle of feeble limbs, curling into the bottom of the bubble. He's able to tell by the route that they're headed for the greenhouse and, undoubtedly, the galaxy warp. Steven half-expects, half-prays that one of the Crystal Gems is hot on their tail, reformed and ready to rescue him from this perilous situation.

In the back of his mind, Steven realizes his family may be out of action for longer than usual. They did take a direct hit from a diamond, no matter the stature or condition of said diamond. Steven remembers the awe he felt when he witnessed his gem half's power for the first time; that ear-shattering scream, the cracked stone, the crater beneath it's glowing feet, the way he was able to match and overpower White Diamond so effortlessly. That sort of strength he didn't know his gem was capable of, volatile without his humanity to filter it, was terrifying. It was a train of thought, among many, that Steven usually elected not to follow since that day in White's head. Right now, however, utterly defenseless and at the mercy of this rogue, unfiltered diamond, it was a train of thought he simply couldn't ignore.

When they make it to the galaxy warp, Steven lets out a final plea, his guts twisting with anxiety as he comes to terms with being so far from his family and home. 404 deliberately ignores him, stepping up onto the warp with his carryon that consists of Steven's captured and subdued counterparts.

With helpless tears blurring his vision, Steven spares one last look at his home through the pink haze, the crystalline greenhouse with a doorway that reveals the edge of his beloved beach house and an obstructed view of the shore washing up on the sand. He bites his lip hard when his view is swallowed up by the white beam of the activating warp pad.

<010010100101110101011010110010>  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ooo things are getting pretty hairy. Where do you guys think 404 is taking Steven? I'll never tell (until I post the next chapter, of course). 
> 
> Hope you enjoyed this chapter! It was a lot of fun to write. Thanks for reading!


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